Kristie Nadeau

“Although, I will never truly be healed, as those suffering the loss of loved rarely ever are, MEG's Gift has helped to ease the pain. There have been so many lives touch by these connections and can only hope to know some of the lives saved by our work…My experience losing Meg has left me a different person. I have a profound empathy for those battling depression/anxiety and their loved ones.  I have learned that mental health is not something to be taken for granted and that EVERYONE is touched by mental health struggles.”

CW: Mentions suicide

NAMI: What is Meg's Gift, and how did it come to be?

KN: Sadly, on President’s Day, February 17, 2014, at the age of 27, Meg lost her battle with depression. MEG's Gift was then started to honor the legacy of how Megan lived and gave to others. MEG's Gift is a grass roots 501 C 3 non-profit run by family and friends to help improve mental health awareness in the Rochester community.

NAMI: Tell us about Meg!

KN: There's truly no one else like Meg. She was the most sincere, empathetic, generous and thoughtful person. She put others and their comforts before her own. To this day, she continues to inspire me by her ability to be genuinely thoughtful of others. Whether it be a handwritten card, a snack or a hug;  you always knew you how much you meant to Meg when you were with her.  

NAMI: How is your involvement in Meg's Gift part of your healing journey?

KN: MEG's Gift has been a huge part of my healing from the loss of Meg. It helps me feel connected to Meg by honoring her memory through the works of MEG's Gift and the connections we have made along the way. There has been so many magical connections made since MEG's Gift started. Some of those connections are MEG's Gift with current CEO of NAMI, Kristina Mossgraber; Kristina with folks at CooperVision (my current employer) and many I don’t even know about.  Knowing how proud MEG would be is also what helps heal my heart.

KN: Although, I will never truly be healed, as those suffering the loss of loved rarely ever are, MEG's Gift has helped to ease the pain. There have been so many lives touch by these connections and can only hope to know some of the lives saved by our work. It's truly a REVOLUTION! 

NAMI: We know suicide loss can bring complicated grief. What would you want others to know about your experience?

KN: My experience losing Meg has left me a different person. I have a profound empathy for those battling depression/anxiety and their loved ones.  I have learned that mental health is not something to be taken for granted and that EVERYONE is touched by mental health struggles.  I have had my own challenges with anxiety and depression throughout the years and have been on medication for the better part of 13 years. Some days I don’t have to do much to maintain my mental health. However, there are days when I really need to work on it. In my most challenging moments, I can remember feeling miserable to the core. No matter how great my life seemed, it didn’t matter because I was that miserable.  I have had to find the tools to work through my depression. I found talking about it to the point of exhaustion helped. Working out was an outlet and medication helped even out the edges. My grief has taught me you have to work through your feelings and find the tools that work for you.

KN: Currently as a full time working mom with a 3 year old and 9 month old,  keeping the balance and my mental health in check isa new challenge. Days are long and difficult and during tough moments I get those familiar anxious feelings again and that’s when I need to hone into the tools; old and new. Long gone are the days of running or doing yoga for hours. Some days I barely have time to brush my hair let alone work out or focus on myself. Today the tools that help are practicing gratitude. When there are days my baby hasn’t slept more than 4 hours and my 3 year old is having back to back tantrums, I try and remind myself that if I could, I would not change a thing. These babies and my husband are all I have ever wished for. Staying grateful brings me perspective, clarity and strength.

NAMI: Why do you believe suicide prevention awareness is so important?

KN: Prevention through advocacy and talking about mental health helps to destigmatize mental health that can lead to suicide or suicidal thoughts. I believe through sharing ones stores we can slowly break down those barriers. It lets others know they are not alone in their feelings and that those feelings are valid. 

NAMI: Do you have words of encouragement for other survivors of suicide loss?

KN: Find a way to honor your loved one and remember how they lived and not how they died. Share your story because you never know who it will resonate with or even save. And above all, take care of your own mental health and reach out to local resources; there are so many wonderful resources in Rochester such as NAMI.