Yaz Turner

“The act of creating is a journey all on it's own. Creativity provides a release for me to uncover all of the feelings I have. I don't always know how to express myself, so creativity gives me that voice. It's always a relief to make something beautiful out of all the chaos that I feel inside.”

NAMI: Have you ever had any mental health struggles?

YT: While growing up I struggled with depression, social anxiety and PTSD. I didn't know what was going on with me before I was diagnosed. I never heard of anxiety before. I only heard of depression as a means of being sad. And as of PTSD, I was completely miseducated on it. During that time I felt really alone and lost. I compared myself to everyone around me and felt as if I was the only one who didn't have it all together.

NAMI: How have you healed and grown from your experiences?

YT: I spent a lot of time doing deep inner work in the beginning of my healing journey. At first, I believed that I wasn't lovable until I was "fixed.” I took on an unhealthy approach to healing as a way to perfect myself. I had this belief that I wouldn't be good enough for anyone until I fixed what was wrong with me. But in the midst of my journey I realized that there is no such thing as being "fixed" or being perfect. And that I'm already enough, simply as I am. Which then began my self love journey.

NAMI: What has your experience been when you’ve sought mental health support and/or treatment?

YT: I was so against therapy when I first started. I didn't believe it would work and I couldn't comprehend anyone caring about me or how I felt. I was misguided on what therapy was. I had the perception that therapy is just another place for judgment, expect they get paid to judge you. But I was so wrong. Therapy was a major part of my healing journey. It provided a safe space for me to do the inner work and speak freely on all of the trauma I had experienced - without judgement.

NAMI: How does creativity serve your mental health?

YT: The act of creating is a journey all on it's own. Creativity provides a release for me to uncover all of the feelings I have. I don't always know how to express myself, so creativity gives me that voice. It's always a relief to make something beautiful out of all the chaos that I feel inside. 

NAMI: Why did you decide to share your story with us?

YT: I decided to share my story because I want to help someone else who may be in the same situation I once was in, and let them know that it's gonna be okay. I know what it's like to feel alone. I also know how scary it can be when you're going through a really hard time and you're not sure on how to cope. But it will be okay. Each day gets better - even when it feels like it's not.

NAMI: What keeps you hopeful?

YT: On a good day it's easy to be hopeful, but on a bad day it can be really tough.

YT: What I've found is that finding connection and seeking out kindness helps me immensely. Having a support system that I can turn to always has and does make a difference. The people that you surround yourself with either keep you going or stop you in your tracks. So I like to surround myself with people who feel like sunshine.